Three Things

Posted by & filed under BLOG, Film, Space-poc.

Here’s what I want:

things_01_02_and_03

The third film —  that red one on the right, there — doesn’t exist. It’s the poster I knocked together for the sequel I want to see happen right after Carpenter’s original.

The title is “The Thing” in Russian (well, according to Wikipedia and Google Translate).

Taking information provided in Carpenter’s flick and in the ’11 prequel, I want the Russians — warned by Kate, the survivor of the prequel — to go to the American station and find MacReady and Childs frozen outside per the closing scene of the ’82 original. [But because I want my dream third Thing to be about Cold War Russians and not about Kurt Russell and Keith David (I love both you guys, just not for this flick) I don’t want it to go exactly how Carpenter has talked about his sequel ideas.]

Since the “alien copy monster” part of the story is out of the bag because of the survivor of the prequel, I want the third one to be more the Aliens chapter of the story. Eerie Soviet nuke-suits and AKs all around. Cold War paranoia writ large. Some kind of a Commissar maybe, or at the very least a KGB plant.

I thingk (heh) extruding all of the following through the 3D printer that is Thing 1 and Thing 2 gets us quite solidly to a red and unpleasant land.

solaris_2010_01

world_war_amerika01

meteor_red01

red_galosh01

doctor_candidate01

For good measure I recommend tweaking the final product with equal doses of FPSRussia, every Armageddon scene with Lev Andropov and these:

red-star-winter-orbit01

30_days_of_night01

And because it’s the secondgoddamn week of winter” the Russians have their work cut out for them.

Oh, and I want Simon Roy to at the very least storyboard it. He is a guy who gets Russians-meet-Aliens:

jans_atomic_heart01

It is a dream I have.

[Edit: Speaking of Russian/Aliens, this movie has to have a Kamov in it!]